gratia.

i feel slightly benedict arnoldian being in london for thanksgiving, but i don't feel strongly enough to change it.  benedict arnold or not, i share just a few of the things for which i am grateful on this day of thanks.

i think we feel a greater sense of gratitude for certain things during certain times of our lives.  today, at this moment, i am particularly grateful for the chance i have to see new places in this wonderful world and to experience it all in safety.  anna and i drove around wales and england for a couple of days and there were certainly a few times where-- because we were driving on the opposite side of the road through narrow streets, hurtling towards oncoming semis who couldn't give a damn about whether or not we were american drivers-- the possibility for injury increased.  but we remained safe, certainly due to a power greater than our own.

i am grateful for family and the chance i have to be with anna today.  i would be a liar if i said my family was without struggle and dysfunction, but if given the opportunity, i wouldn't choose to be a part of any other.  it seems that the people we love most bring the most heartache, but also the most joy. i look forward to the day when we can all be in each other's company once again.

i am grateful for those people i've been able to meet through what some may call chance, but i call fate, or destiny, or the direction of the higher power.  if you look at the facts, there is no doubt that there is someone else who is in control-- there are far too many stars that aligned to argue otherwise.  at every turn, my choices (going to BYU, choosing to play rugby, study abroad, moving to texas, etc.) are blessed with people who continually enrich my experience on this earth.  

i am grateful for meaningful employment.  i love the students and i love those with whom i work.  the feeling of being self-sufficient in a job that has the potential to make a difference in the lives of others is irreplaceable.

lastly, i am grateful for the peace, comfort, and happiness that comes from my faith.  i am grateful for the kind of person it pushes me to be, for its emphasis on serving others, and the change that happens when living by its principles.  i am grateful that it requires everything of you.  and i am grateful that it blesses me with more than everything in return.

londres

where to begin?

i've only been in england for 2.5 days and it's already been glorious.  tomorrow, fo and i start on our 2-day adventure to hit up wales and the peak district. via car.  pray that we both remember to remain on the correct side of the road so as not to incur any injury.  

to re-cap the past few days:  

i arrived saturday morning and after persuading the customs officer to let me into the country (i didn't have an exact address of where i would be staying), fo and i made the trip to her apartment in the east end.  it is fantastic to be with fo, as she is my favorite second sister.  but really.  while she still may not have forgiven me for usurping her 5th birthday (i was born just two days before), i am so grateful to experience this trip with her.  

saturday evening's festivities included an amazing evensong service at st. paul's and picking up my dear, dear friend s. at the train station.  s. and i became friends on study abroad and sh is currently living in paris.  she graciously agreed to make the trip up to london for the weekend so we could have some more adventures together. a word about s: s is truly one of my favorite people on this earth.  both nights she was here, we stayed up past 3:00am talking and laughing about anything and everything. now, those of you that know me understand this is quite a feat.  i usually find myself incapable of staying up past midnight, so my ability to stay up so late talking with s. should give you an indication of how well we get along.  i love being able to talk with her as though no time as passed.  

sunday included a visit to the tower of london while fo worked, delicious thai street food, a visit to trafalgar square and the national gallery, an organ concert at westminster abbey, dinner at wagamama's, and a long walk back to the flat along the thames.  being back in europe makes me remember how much i love discovering new places.  and having s. along for the ride made it just that much better.  

and now it's time to shove off.  the café is closing and i am tired.  on to wales!

!

three years have passed since i've been to europe and i'm currently sitting in the (very nice) toronto airport on my way to england to visit schwester #2 for thanksgiving.  i have to say--this trip snuck up on me quite quickly.  i bought my ticket back in september and since then, life caused me to forget about traveling back to a place to which i owe a great deal.  i kind of feel like i just decided to go to england today.  there was no build-up like with study abroad or ghana; i started packing late last night and finished after work today.  i have a list of things to do, but no definite plan (hope that's not stressing you out, fo!) on the docket is the lake district, wales, a few days in london, oxford, stratford-upon-avon, and anywhere else my heart fancies.  to make matters even better, i get to see a study abroad bestie for a day or two. hooray!

but now, in the same moment i'm writing this, it's starting to sink in.  and i'm excited. damn, i'm excited.  

so here's to a thanksgiving in the motherland.  here's to reconnecting to a place i hold very, very dear.  here's to europa.  

schwestern.

in the spirit of thanksgiving, i want express my gratitude for these three:

they are truly my best friends. 

the miles between us result in an underlying longing to be together, but today i feel it more acutely than normal.  the day when we can all laugh together without the facilitation of technology can not come soon enough.

schwestern, schwestern über alles.

blip in the radar.

this post may make little sense.  my apologies in advance.

question: do you ever have those out of mind experiences where the video camera of your life suddenly pans out and for a brief moment, you a get a bird's-eye view of the bigger picture?

i'm thinking specifically about experiences involving people; those with whom you spend very little time but make a profound impact on you, for better or for worse.  you wonder how people who drastically affect your life suddenly disappear, whether by choice or by circumstance, and you are left wondering whether or not they really happened... it seems that in the bigger picture they are just a blip in the radar, a momentary flash of light.  and then they move out and move on.

i'm trying to learn not to focus on this; people come in and out of our lives and it's just the way it goes. but i still struggle with the why.  and knowing how much energy to expend trying to keep people around.  i probably always will.  so we move forward, recognizing the blip when it happens, but trying not to dwell on the fact that it's just that: a blip.  

p.s. england in 7 days.