values.

the "what's" and "how's" of happiness have been on the mind recently, so when someone shed light--accompanied with a little extra perspective--on the topic, i couldn't help but share.  here's how the conversation went (in essence):

(someone) "we shouldn't strive for happiness..."

(me) "i'm sorry.... say WHAAAT?" 

(someone) "happiness is an emotion and by definition, emotions are changing.  if we strive to attain a certain emotional state we will frequently be left wanting-- wondering what we've done wrong when we aren't happy."

(me) "yes, yes.  i understand that. but doesn't it seem a bit strange to not want to be happy?"

(someone) "instead of focusing on wanting to be happy, we should figure out what our values are (in the non-LDS sense)... the things in our lives that we hold most dear to us (education, our profession, our families, being compassionate, helping others, our spirituality, etc.) and work our hardest at the things we value most.  happiness may accompany that work, but so will other emotions, like anger, heartache, sadness, because that's how life is. no matter what emotional state we may be in, if we are working towards those things we value most, our life can be fulfilling."

mind. blown.

maybe all of you who are much smarter than i have figured this whole life thing out already, but something clicked in my head when i heard this concept explained to me in this way.  don't peg happiness as the ultimate goal, but rather figure out what you love, what you care about most, make them priorities in your life, work at it, and life will be more meaningful.  

like i said.  mind. blown.